Settlement Blues

[Alexei & Kryii]

For the record, I have to check carefully. We keep trying to spell it 'colour.' Doesn't work like that.

Rightm then. I'm not newly settled, but it seems like had a euphoria that's worn down a bit. I know what I'm going to be for the rest of our life, and yet... I still remember how it used to be. Flight and swiming and rapid changechangechangechange... I made Alexei promise not to make me a 'changeling.'

I didn't liek the thought of 'lying.' Except now, I wish he would look at me and see a tern, or a dog, or a bear, or anything but me.

I don't know what is going on, whether it's jsut me or what, but that's how it is, it seems. And that was a lot of passive voice in one little spot. Grrrr... damnedable English classes.

That's another thing. Do you know how hard it is for a barn cat to growl? It ain't happening. I'm like to going nuts as I am slowly realizing all the things that I can't do anymore. This forum- all of you who can still change, anyway- seems almost harmful in that regard.

And then I remember that I know exactly what I am, and I don't have to worry I'll get it wrong. That's good, isn't it?

I s'pose I want to set this up for me, now, and for others later who settle. Or who find the settlement blues after a year. After a few months. What have you. What can I say? Alexei and I both wish we could help everyone. *sigh* The difference is that he is everyone to me...

[|3200k1]

I've always been happy. Just finely cheerful and so was she until a few months later. -_-; Cars can get confusing with someone as big as me and as many people as there are in there. Either way she occasionally wishes I was an arctic for or ermine or RED PANDA *glare*,so iI'll be amusing sometimes and do jsut that for a few days in order to make myself be appreciated properly once more. ^_^

[Sayuri & Alla]

Settling was a little hard for us.. I admit we were rather late doing it. At first she wasn't sure of the arctic hare form I finally settled as, but with every day, it fits more and more, and we're beginning to truly understand it.

Sure, I miss flying - and being so small sucks sometimes. When Sayuri was a little girl, I often became big, strong forms to protect her. The playground gangs backed off when I was around, heheh.. I was a bit of a fighter back in the day. I can't always make her feel safe and loved anymore. I still wish I could go back to those days, sometimes, when I'd become a wolf, and lick her face of tears, and she'd fall asleep against me.

Her childhood wasn't very grand..

But, that I've settled as a hare is an effect of who she is, and will someday become. I wouldn't have settled if it wasn't right.

[Hunter]

I've been settled for more then a year, and we both like it, but sometimes I wish I could be bigger, or fly, or not drown when she swims in the pool. But when time passes, you finaly understand that you can't be other animal, 'cose it wouldn't be you. Now I don't miss so much to change, but at the begining, I missed curlying into my cat form by her side, in the other pillow when she slept, feeling how strange my cat form was, and how powerfull I felt... Stupid feeling through. But I like my settled form. And I promise that, if your form now is the right one, you'll finally like it

[Alexei & Kryii]

Yes, I'm not really that unhappy. But... I do miss changing from time to time.

After a dream we both seemed to share last night, though, I think some of what's brought us down is something else entirly. So, basically, I'm too worried or down over this. But thank you all for you kindness. ^^

[t o n i + r i n t o]

I don't think I've settled yet. Not sure if I want to. I hardly ever change from a song thrush though. It just feels so.. comfortable. When we go to Egypt though (at midnight tonight!) Toni'll be swimming a lot more, so no doubt I'll try out a few aquatic forms ;D

[Sil and Veil]

By the time my person had even realized I exist, I was already settled. So we didn't get to experience changing together. *deer sulk*

[|3200k1]

Toni said:

I don't think I've settled yet. Not sure if I want to. I hardly ever change from a song thrush though. It just feels so.. comfortable. When we go to Egypt though (at midnight tonight!) Toni'll be swimming a lot more, so no doubt I'll try out a few aquatic forms ;D

Egypt?! Oh,wow! Thats my to-go list. Where are you going? Pyramids?

[Alexei & Kryii]

If I wasn't a white anglo-saxxon, I would be going to the University of Cairo if it ruined me to get there...

My thread. Dear. *claw*

Owie...

Best language program in the world. Or at least no where near the worst. Top notch Archaeology (and Egyptology) areas, too. Plus a surprisingly large program for the study of ancient Greek, both NT and Sepu... er... the other one. That neither of us can spell. Gr.

[cock of teh walk]

i dont understand um i mean were talking about your soul here. do you really think its limited to things like volume of growl or not being able to fly because of lack of wings? Its not about changing forms its about about your emotions...if you feel like your soul is flying or drowning ..it doesnt need to sprout wings or grow gils. it can be as abstract as you want it to be

[Zoe 'n' Calosta]

Yeah but sometimes it's easier to envision something more logical to help us visualize it.

Hey! Daemons only - get out!

[Alexei & Kryii]

"Hepcat" now, eh? I like it. "Everybody wants to be a cat." ;D

What we mean, mostly what I mean is not that I am not an abstraction or that I even have this "physical" form at all. But the feeling of being feline is part of my nature, now. I purr when I'm asleep or dozing. Alexei has confirmed this.

I miss the sense of flying without the feeling that is is, deep within me, entirly wrong.

[Tyrannus et Callida]

Yes, that makes sense. You are what you feel like you are. Or, at least for us dæmons.

[Monkey and Bellanei]

I love reviving dead threads posted by people who don't go here anymore...

Anyway, I don't like being settled. It's not like I don't like being a red fox. I like it. But my favorite form was a lion. I would rather have settled as that, but unfortunately my human isn't at all like a lion.

[Sinead and Jax]

I don't mind being settled, because I still change form sometimes. Wei both know I'm settled as the jackrabbit, but if it's easier for me to be the magpie, or if Sinead's angry and it helps her cool off steam for me to be the leopard seal, then why not change? And I realize that was an extremely long and grammatically incorrect sentence, so just deal with it.