Life Span of a Daemon

[Kate and Kael]

I refuse to tiptoe where this is concerned, TU. It enrages me that so many would be so willing to just...throw their daemon away and try to make themselves feel justified by saying it was 'time'. They can try and fool themselves, but I still call bull.
Alexei, I can relate to you not speaking to your daemon 24/7. Kael and I don't speak constantly. But he IS there, projected, always. It's no difficult task for me to give my daemon shape, and to feel his interactions with my world. My tiger's 'sensitive whiskers'. I always feel him, and he doesn't take a back seat.
For me, it's not about talking. Not entirely. The fact that you can...can "grow out" of your daemon, not just not speaking to them, but letting them sit dormant..that's what repulses me. Even if I'm not speaking to Kael, he's always alive. Always there, never not. He will never not be there. In my mind, close to my body, he'll never stop being there. I'll never "grow out" of him. The whole point in his settling was us growing UP.
You never stop needing your soul. The daemon is here to be our soul, number one. Without Kael...without Kael I wouldn't be me. He will never, ever not have a purpose in my life. To me, saying that a daemon has a purpose and once that purpose is finished, then it's pointless to visualize or talk to your daemon much...I can't do that. That's the ultimate treason to your-self-.

EDIT: I don't care if it was HARSH. This is why Kael is a tiger and not a deer. Everybody else can tippy-toe and mince along, but I WILL put my cards on the table and I won't be Little Miss Posy about it and beg forgiveness for my emotions.

[Alexei & Kryii]

I like her.

You are not a tiger, Kryii...

Closer than most, dear.

I agree with the ideas you set forward... to say "I lvoe unconditionally but I forget you. Sorry." That is deplorable in my book.

But not projecting her all the time isn't wrong or mean or even heartless. She's still there, I just choose not to look for her, to see her.

Project implies I'm not there unless he puts me there. I don't like that. At all. As you said yourself, the soul is ALWAYS needed, always there.

-_- Anyway... I can still talk to her, feel her love, and she feels mine. But when I am, for example, in the middle of a test, I "dis-project" her-- I don't "see" her. She's there, she'll be there later, but she understands that my "seeing" her is concentration I should put on my test, instead. In fact, I get yelled at otherwise... mean little kitten...

*loving CLAW TO ANKLE*

[Tyrannus et Callida]

To Kate: Yes, well, that's all fine and good, but when you get all nasty about it, it makes others around you the same way. I don't really give a damn whether you think you should be harsh or not. You need to think about those who share the forum with you. If you start randomly doing things like this, it's gonna start to piss people off, and make their time here less enjoyable than they would care for it to be. It also discourages new members from joining. If someone browsing the site comes across this, we come off as psychopaths. Vent your feelings, but please, don't go overboard with it. I completely understand why you were harsh. That's the way I am, too. But, you need to control yourself.

I'm sorry, but it just had to be said.

[Kate and Kael]

Yelling feels better. Nobody's going to change my opinion on this. *stalks off the topic*

[Tyrannus et Callida]

I didn't ask to change your opinion. I just told you to settle down.

[J and Captiosus]

Kate said:

How hypocritical. You people talk about loving your daemons. Caring about them. They're your soul. You talk about how you love their advice. And you can sit there staring at your computer and have the nerve to write that you'll "grow out" of them. Is that love? Is that affection? How can you grow out of your soul and then as pleased as pie say you "love" it? That's not love. That's kicking it to the curb like growing out of a puppy. But so much deeper. That is sick. Truly, I thought Ghost had taken the cake with my disgusto-meter, but this really does take the cake.
Your daemon's life span is YOUR life span. Just because a few people have decide to throw their daemons back into the dark, it doesn't mean it's inevitable. J, you make it sound like it is. "..I wanted to see if people were aware and accepted this, or if they were sensitive about it..." As if the daemon dies like an old pet. What, you use it up, and then when it's useless to you, you toss it under the bed? Throw it out for a new toy?
How can you treat your daemon like a possession? I like having one now. Belief. To me, my daemon isn't a 'belief'. We're not all studying daemonism. Everyone has a daemon. Even if they never see it, never know what it's like to be loved by theirs. You don't sign up for daemonism and then hit the books. You speak to it or not, visualize it or not, but the very idea of abandoning it, "growing out" of it..what a bunch of hypocrites. A bunch of little kids playing around with your souls, and then when you "grow up" sure, they won't matter. It's all just a game today, and yesterday's new age try-out tomorrow. What a load of bull.
Kael will never stop being there for me. And I will never just "grow out" of him. Because I love MY daemon. And love is not leaving your own in the dark. Love is NOT "GROWING OUT" of someone as close to you and as loving to you as your daemon. You people should be ashamed. I don't care who disagrees with me. You can gripe at me all you want. You should be ****ing ashamed. This is disgusting. Monkey, Cat, Kibs, this is not directed at you, nor at anyone else who feels that this thread and this topic is sick enough to make your stomach twist.

See, that's what I mean by "sensitive." I chose extra PC words because I know how delicate a subject any new thinking on daemons might be.
instead of automatically saying, "omg dont say that thats disgusting daemons dont go away" consider what I said. Will you still be projecting your daemon in 5 years? in 10? in 20? If you are, then great, you've proven me wrong. And if not, then that's the point I was trying to make.
And I'm not saying to give up on daemons. To give up or grow out. Or that you don't love them or you'd want to stop projecting them. I'm just saying that one day--forget it. Anything I say will sound wrong.

[Cat]

I'm definitely agreeing with everything Kate said. She shares my opinions; I'm glad she was "harsh", and I think it's nice to have a resident tiger ( seeing as our resident wolverine is gone ). It's wrong to stifle her opinions just because she expresses them in a more blunt way. Yes, I'd be saying that even if she were against the idea of dæmons being a lifelong companion.

J, Okibi has been projecting Rookie as a dæmon for about six years now. And I believe ever since she was a toddler she's been talking to him. So maybe she's already proved you wrong. There's other people here who've been talking to their dæmons for years.

I've only known Pocket for about fifteen months now, but I know he'll be around forever. The weakest point of our relationship was the first few months. We only got stronger. We're continuing to get stronger.

I really don't like this thread. No; I dislike the replies. I thought your dæmons meant more to you guys, really. I guess I expected too much.

I'll leave now.

[J and Captiosus]

I wasn't trying to stifle her opinion.
Also, there's a reason I put the term "grow out" in quotations in my original post. I can't explain what happened to Capt, just that he started to seem less real after 3 days of acheiving the highest point of reality. And I see a lot of people having problems with their daemons.

[Cat]

J said:

I wasn't trying to stifle her opinion.

I wasn't referring to you.

[StephXZed]

I agree with Alexei & Kryii- just because I might not project him forever doesn't mean I won't talk to him forever. I often don't project him when I speak to him. I've been speaking to him for about two years, and projecting him since October. To me, it doesn't matter whether he's in form or not. He's always there.

[SNL_Ali]

I hate having to defend myself......I really do, but I was truly hurt by what has been said here.

My relationship with my daemon is....different than mosts. I care for him....so much. I can't even say how much. My word choice was just......not so great. I care for Tyb more than I can ever say--and without a doubt I always will. I love hearing him every day, say nice things to me, comment on the day, help me remember appointments, give me pep talks when I'm feeling down, smile at me when I'm sad, mentally hug me when I'm depressed, and keep me laughing when I'm not. I care for him with every fiber in my being--and in doing that I know that I am loving myself too, and that gives me such self-esteem I cannot even describe it. I know though, that people change, that situations evolve and you get to know yourself more and more as life progresses.

Tyb has been here during the darkest time of my life. He was by my side when one of my old family friends was in a car accident and sentenced to a year-long coma. He was here when my next-best-friend betrayed me, he was here when I was laying on my father's bed trying to tell him it was Okay to die. That was the most difficult thing I have ever had to do. I could never have had the courage to hold his hand and tell him these things without Tyb sitting on my shoulder, giving me the strength I needed. He has helped me through these dark times in so many ways.

I know that people change, that the good times end, that opinions change and people grow apart. I have no idea what the future will bring for me, and I have no idea what will happen to me when that future comes. I know that in these past nine months fully knowing him and loving him will affect me for the rest of my life. I have built a relationship I know will never leave me--because I know it is impossible to live without a soul, without your daemon, your daimon, your concience, your soul, your inner child, your superego--whatever you want to call them. I also know that the time may come when I don't envision him as much, or when I find it difficult to see him. I know though, that even when I don't conciously KNOW that I'm talking to him--I am. And that whenever I have to face another one of those dark days he will be by my side. Or that when I have to face my fears he will be there to give me the courage I need. He is a seabird--no-- *i* am a seabird. I have to endure so many storms and winds and sidetracks in my life. My personal beliefs change as often as the tide turns. But I know that because I am an ancient migrator that my memory is the best of anyone's, and I know that I will never forget Tribalthos. And I know that I will never truly leave or abandon him. And I know even those people who said--like me--that someday they MAY just "grow apart" from their daemon, that even though you don't want to know him or her, and even though you may not feel interested in talking or knowing them any longer, that they will be there for you, and they'll be there when you have to hug your family friend who's daughter is in a coma, or when you have to forgive the friend who stabbed you in the back, or even when you have to say your goodbyes to a dying father, because that is a daemon's purpose, and because every human on this Earth has to endure these trials until the end of our lives, your daemon will NEVER leave you.

I do not know what will happen to me in the future.....I do not know if I will "grow apart" relationship-wise, or if it will counter whatever I come across later in life, or if our relationship will survive and persist throughout the years. I just don't know, because I can't tell the future.

I am not a hippocrit because I do not know what will happen in the future. I am not a hippocrit because my daemon has helped me through the darkest of days and I do not truly know what will happen to me in the future. I love Tribalthos with the intensity of ten thousand suns--but I cannot know what will happen in my life later on. This topic is hurtful to everyone....I'm really starting to dislike it strongly. I'm sorry for the long post.....but I just felt the need to defend myself a little bit. Thanks.

[Zoe 'n' Calosta]

Wow....cool post SNL. I have to agree with Kate, I was the same way. I love Cal more than I can say. I won't 'grow out' of him because he is me and he's been there since I was born, even as the little voice inside my head. Now that I know he's more than my conscious I could never go back to thinking the same way I did before. Never. I went through a doubting stage for about 2 weeks and that was the worst thing ever. Horrible, words can't even describe it. Some people just have their daemons when they feel alone, it's like that saying 'when you smile the whole world smiles with you but when you cry you're alone' or something like that. Some people decide to project their daemons then and then when they actually smile, because of their daemons, the world is their best friend and they don't see the need for their daemon any more. I don't, in that respect, need Cal anymore but I do need him in a different sense. I plan to share this magnificent gift with my children and future husband

IF you ever get married

Yeah, what the sarcastic panther said. Wait - shouldn't panthers be aggressive?

I am aggressive! Where do you think you got that awesome panther snarl and roar from in drama class?

Long, embarassing story. Don't ask.

[Mandi & Sybin]

Yes, hi. I am new here. Nice to meet you all.

First of all, I understand the rift of differences in this forum, and I respect those differences, but what I do not understand is the amount of closed-mindedness and misunderstandment of several of the individuals who have since replied.

I agree first and foremost with J and Alexei, but my idea of this entire "growing out of" topic is far different than some.
Isn't "discovering" your dæmon for the first time not unlike bringing home a new puppy? Oh, the excitement of that first look you take upon him! You know then and there that he will be your best friend for all eternity. But its been 5 years. Your puppy is an adult now. He can no longer fit underneath your couch, and you have a difficult time holding him, but your love burns just as strong. You know his favorite toy, his likes and dislikes, you've taught him tricks and obedience, and while you're not constantly giving him the amount of attention you used to give him as a puppy, that doesn't mean that you love him any less.
Hmm. But it may be hard for some of you to grasp that concept (i'm not sure how many die-hard dog lovers we have in this forum ). So here's another:
I've heard people tell me several times (my communication professor included) that you know you are the most comfortable with a friend when the silence you share isn't awkward. I feel that that could be true with dæmons as well. Sybin and I have never talked as much as a lot of people here talk with their dæmons, but both of us are entirely fine with that. Neither of us feel the need to. That doesn't mean I'm "abandoning" him. He and I both know that for us to live successful lives, its better to communicate through our souls - psychologically - rather than pysically and verbally.
Its rude to entitle somebody a "hypocrite" when you don't know the person or his/her dæmon personally. Perhaps they have found that complete comfort zone and no longer feel the need for verbal communication? Maybe they both decided that they didn't need to talk to one another as much as they used to? That doesn't signify betrayal or abandonment.

I can understand how personal some people are feeling from the topic, but its always best to be open-minded about things rather than jumping to conclusions straight away. Think for a moment the reasoning behind the idea. Sybin doesn't feel "betrayed" that I don't project him all the time. He doesn't feel "abandoned" that I don't verbally communicate with him. We are both in bliss with one another because of it.

That is just my opinion. And lets not forgot that our dæmons are constantly within our souls and no not take physical form, which I'm sure is another contributing factor for this "growing out" experience.

Thank you.
- Mandi and Sybin.

[StephXZed]

Can't say it any better then what you've said, SNL.

[Tyrannus et Callida]

Cat said:

I'm definitely agreeing with everything Kate said. She shares my opinions; I'm glad she was "harsh", and I think it's nice to have a resident tiger ( seeing as our resident wolverine is gone ). It's wrong to stifle her opinions just because she expresses them in a more blunt way.

I wasn't trying to stifle her. I was trying to get her to tone it down a bit, because I've been on the delivering end of such comments, and every time it hasn't ended well. I respect the way she is, but all I was saying is that she needs to take into consideration the feelings of others here. That comment wasn't even directed at me and I felt insulted. Just think of how those on the recieving end felt? I said before, I'm also harsh by nature. But, I know that it doesn't pay off.

Y'know what? Everyone, take a deep breath, and apologize to one another for anything we might have said that could have been interpreted negatively. Then, we need to relax and start over.

*deep breath*

Everyone, I'm sorry.