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Post by Matt and Areus on Oct 23, 2006 7:25:54 GMT -5
'Moralistic' isn't even actually a compliment XD It implies being picky to the point of being a snob. I know many a time when the 'ur m0m' joke has gone...wrong. Someone: So what do you want to do? Someone else: *Absently* Your mum. Someone: 00 Someone else: ...crap. Most of my friends 'your mom' jokes have gone that way on purpose. -_-; Me: I think this scripture is kind of cool, it's like a get out of buring by death free card! Everyone else: ... Me: death by burning...>>; Unrelated note: Scriptures are so weird. o.o;
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⅓
rising dæmian
more likely reptilian than not.
Posts: 65
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Post by ⅓ on Oct 23, 2006 10:52:31 GMT -5
We just shortened it to "you" jokes. So it's like:
Something/someone says: ...and calcium fortifies bones. One of us: You fortify bones.
Except that sometimes it comes out really funny like when someone says, "<some... things> are not for anyone," and the response is "You're not for anyone." -responsible for that one-
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Mie
rising dæmian
Craps.
Posts: 40
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Post by Mie on Oct 23, 2006 11:09:37 GMT -5
XDDD @ Spi's and Winger's.
My School has the whole thing.
Someone says: I really like that guy. Kid: Your MOM likes that guy. In my head: BA-DUM-PISH.
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Post by Ash and Jak on Oct 23, 2006 14:20:10 GMT -5
In spanish class last year:
(My friend picks me up and puts me over his shoulder and procedes to carry me across the room) Friend: I'm just going to throw you through the window. Don't worry.
(Another friend over an AIM conversation) Girl (trying to spell Britain): Whee stupid brit...bri...ENGLAND!
Drama Camp friend: I don't think we're allowed to have endangered animals in the house. (Don't even ask. >.>)
(Last yea in Math class..) Teacher: I didn't take anything with me. Friend: You mean you ran around the streets nude? Me: I hear that's legal in France. (I don't even know why I said that. XD He did just get back from France though. )
(From some random IM conversation) Friend: Stop question marking me!
Drama Kid during an improv sketch: There's no I in chorus, only an O and a U.
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Post by Cat on Oct 23, 2006 14:38:11 GMT -5
Old Lady One: ...Well, I do feel sorry for her, of course- Old Lady Two: Oh, yes, it was terrible. Old Lady One: But at least now she's lost her leg there's no chance she'll be a prostitute any more... Oh man, I just burst out laughing. XD Thanks.
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Post by Ash and Jak on Oct 23, 2006 20:22:40 GMT -5
This one was overheard at band practice today. I just have to share it. >.>
My freshman to one of the identical twins who go to our school (discussing the upcoming spirit week): So...who's going to be your twin for twin day?
She was dead serious too. o.o I couldn't believe I actually heard that. XD
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Jory and Mew
rising dæmian
Jory the Tonkgirl and Mew the pigeonrat
Posts: 69
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Post by Jory and Mew on Oct 23, 2006 20:41:20 GMT -5
My mum actually mixed up the time for my tai chi class, so we got there at 10, when the class really started at 9. So we went off again, and, while shopping for soldering irons, I found and asked for a giant nail (it was about seven to eight inches long, and cost $1.40 AUD). Then, to make mum feel better about missing my tai chi (as a rodent-soul, namely a squirrel, she's a real worrier)...
Me: Well, one good thing happened today that couldn't have happened at tai chi. Mum: *harassed* What's that? Me: *holds up nail* I got a giant nail.
Something about the innocent way I said it made mum pull over, and we both roared with laughter xD;; That was kind of sweet.
EDIT: Oh, oh! A couple more I juuust remembered xDD;; Almost forgot them.
Kookaburras: *laughing* (in Australia it's generally believed that it always rains after kookaburras laugh) Me: *looks out at perfect 30° blue-sky day* I think the kookaburras have gone mad! It can't rain! Dad: *bursts into "Raining In My Heart"* Me: o.o
Me: Can you close the door? Sister: Why? There's a lovely breeze out. *giant branch falls with a thud onto back deck* Sister: O.O Me: *smug* I dislike "lovely breezes".
Lemming (my cat): *plays on keyboard* *types something like "Prbjfkeshgcdkjhzasgchsjdgakh &&& ii hi jkls hlewkjqhldfkwh Me: Aw, you're such a -- HOLY ****, YOU TYPED "HI"! O.O
^That last one, I nearly had a heart attack xDDDD;;;
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emily
dæmian
.give up! the rocking boats drowned, the captain is done
Posts: 166
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Post by emily on Oct 23, 2006 21:23:38 GMT -5
Ahaha Mairead.
Ummm. Here's some good examples of being the complete opposite of right!
me: ...like Buddhists, and their attitudes towards religion. kid in my class: yeah, but, Buddhism isn't really a religion, it's just like... chill, man.. that's all.
conversation: [strays towards gandhi somehow] girl: little known fact - he beat his wife, you know! everyone: NO. He didn't. You're wrong. girl: no really, he did! [argues case for ages] everyone: NO. Just.. NO. girl: No. I'm right. ..And martin luther king jr. was racist against white people.
me: it's really interesting how your book's written in second person, I like it. kid in lit circle: um, it's not. second person is when you use names. me: um... no. kid in lit circle: um, yes. first is 'i,' third is 'he,' and second is like, 'steve,' or whatever. me: okay. but uh, no, first is 'i,' third is 'he,' and second is 'you.' kid in lit circle: no, i really think i'm right. me: but.. what do you call 'you' then? kid in lit circle: what are you talking about? you can't write books with 'you.' me: um. [drops it] kid in lit circle: exactly.
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Post by Emma and Jade on Oct 24, 2006 2:17:41 GMT -5
I over heard two guys during lunch at school a couple years ago, I'll never forget this:
First guy: This burrito tastes like my grandma. Second guy: Dude, your grandma tastes good!
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⅓
rising dæmian
more likely reptilian than not.
Posts: 65
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Post by ⅓ on Oct 25, 2006 16:37:46 GMT -5
No direct quotes of stupidity... I was talking to a friend of mine about stupid people and what they'll believe such as: Friend: There's someone in my art class who thinks evolution was debunked. ^^;; He's all like, "Darwin recanted that!!" me: What? xD Friend: I'm going to ask in my astronomy class, I'm 99.9% percent positive that if he did it was under severe pressure from the church. me: Even if he did, it'd probably be like saying Galileo recanted that the earth revolved around the sun. And-- Watching Television Causes Autism. And of course Freud, who said a lot of very silly things.
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emily
dæmian
.give up! the rocking boats drowned, the captain is done
Posts: 166
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Post by emily on Oct 25, 2006 16:52:05 GMT -5
Hehe.
Um. Here's a stupid thing I said, but which I can't take back now.
a: Okay, we need a theme for our joint birthday party. e: How about.. okay. I say, we have a strip tea party! a: What? Like, we get undressed and drink tea? e: And scones. Underwear and scones. a: THAT IS AN AMAZING IDEA. Okay, I'll email everyone so they know the deal. e: I was, uh, kidding. That's a terrible idea. a: [is gone]
AND NOW I HAVE TO DRINK TEA AND TAKE OFF MY CLOTHING ON SATURDAY.
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Mie
rising dæmian
Craps.
Posts: 40
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Post by Mie on Oct 25, 2006 18:47:26 GMT -5
You dug your own grave, Emily. xDD
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Post by |3200k1 on Oct 25, 2006 22:17:10 GMT -5
;_; I want to have a strip tea party.....
Maybe I'll have one by myself and take pictures and post them here. =) Then it'll be like a party with friends?
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Post by Okibi on Oct 26, 2006 1:37:08 GMT -5
Sure, Brooke, sure. =P
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Post by Spiral Sun on Oct 26, 2006 1:52:25 GMT -5
o.O strip tea party?! Indeed it does add a sophisticated angle to a very vulgar activity. You've gotta have biscuits and those scones must be served with cream and expensive jam!
I once convinced a girl that Chocolate Mousse was originally made with moose meat drizzled in sweet syrups in the Medieval times. But it was the French who changed it into the dessert it is today. ;.; She hit me so hard when I started giggling. (But that was to be expected- she hit people a lot)
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